Update: The three winners have been selected. Glad to see people getting creating by, among other things, starting Facebook groups to get more votes. The winners are A Sucker is Born Every Minute…, Techcrunch, Go Back to the Basics, and Trashing TechCrunch. If you are the writer of any of those posts, please email me (see About page) with your contact information and proof of blog ownership – in other words, put your name and email address somewhere on your blog so that I can see it.
Last week we started a contest to give away three free passes to the Web 2.0 Expo in San Francisco on April 15-18, valued at $1,500 each. The rules were simple: dig out the worst post in TechCrunch history and write about why it’s so bad.
We’ve gone through the submissions and have carefully chosen the ten most creative posts (we did not include a couple of submissions where the writers said they weren’t interested in the tickets, and we decided former TechCrunch writer Marshall Kirkpatrick wasn’t eligible to win even though he wrote an excellent post).
We’re conducting a reader poll to determine the top three submissions. This isn’t scientific and it’s possible to game it; however, any obvious mass-gaming will make that submission ineligible to win.
In no particular order, here are the finalists:
- Techcrunch, Go Back to the Basics
- New Direction for TechCrunch
- Delusions of skill and of grandeur
- Trashing TechCrunch
- Techcrunch Trashing (Road to Web 2.0 Expo)
- How to Read TechCrunch
- ZapZap What?
- TechCrunch Contest
- A Sucker is Born Every Minute…
- TechCrunch’s worst post
Here are the ones that just missed the cutoff:
- To All the TechCrunch Haters (too nice)
- TechCrunch Contest Submission (too short)
- Criticism Of Arrington’s Prejudice Against My Religion (good post, but I am currently being accused of being a Google-lover, so missed the mark)
- Adobe Apollo – doesn’t quite cut it.. (too logical, not enough trashing)
- Getting editorial coverage to launch your startup… (zzzzzz – nice trademark infringement though)
- PayPerPost > (TechCrunch * 1000) (the anger just didn’t seem genuine)
- Trash TechCrunch? I’ll Choose the Business Perspective (of course) (too nice)
- Content streams for online TV (too nice)
- Where’s my flying car? (angry his post on TC didn’t result in a buyout. heh.)
Please vote for the post you like the best. The writers of the top three posts will receive a pass to the Web 2.0 Expo. Voting ends in roughly 48 hours – at 6 pm PST on Wednesday, April 11.
“Delusions of skill and of grandeur” is the best one.
“obvious mass-gaming will make that submission ineligible to win.”
Woudn’t people use this tactic to target the best? I mean, Isn’t it possible to do a mass-gaming in favour of your top competitor, forcing the it to be removed, possibly with some advantage for the attacker?
Poll results will be skewed towards those items on the top and bottom of the list. Listing should be randomized.
good point John.
Sorry Anthro, it is what it is.
Where is Marshall Kirkpatrick these days?
Michael Arrington voted for George W.Bush…twice!!!!
Micheal,
I think the order in which the post title’s appear may influence the outcome.
In other words, its very likely that the first post would get a lot of votes regardless of its content.
Game over, Zap Zap what?!
Thanks Michael for putting this on!!
Dear TechCrunch,
Yawn. Even THIS post is masturbation, please let us know when you want to be a blog again and not a pseudo-monetization snore.
Thanks and I look forward to being moderated.
“New Direction for TechCrunch”
Wait, is it too late to nominate this as the worst post ever as I just missed the cut?
*pouting in corner, still waiting for flying car*
Amazing, my post made it in the top 10! That’s because being too nice has never been a concern for me.
Do we get bonus points for trashing our competitors in this contest?
I’ll point TrashCrunch to the winner.
Order in which those articles are listed will definitely effect the outcome. Readers will loose interest by the time they reach towards the bottom.
Michael – How about reversing their position after 24hrs?
I vote for myself, David B.
My post is the one with PayPerPost in it, and the anger wasn’t genuine… I can’t be mad at ya Mike.
“Delusions of skill and of grandeur” is amazing!
TYPE: “http://www.Powerset.com”
WHATTT?!?!?!
Bambi wrote articles about powerset. Mike wrote new age watergate scandal (powerset.com) — Vaperware!!! Bambi quit her job and start Vator.tv.
CBS marketwatch is put huge flame balls at Bambi Francisco (Vator.tv) .
Now, Powerset.com reminds me “Whitney houston” company — “Israel is my land!!!” hehehehe. I’ll stick with Google.
How do you convert future Powerset stock into toilet paper?
I need for my rectum.
ha ha delusions all the way! character assasination is the best!
Had I the foresight, I might have posted about how this contest is the worst TechCrunch post ever. Two flaws:
a) The criteria of ‘just trash TechCrunch’ is too broad. The winning posts are categorically different, involving general suggestions, commentary on the worst post ever, and an essay on why TechCrunch is worthless.
The voting scheme makes it an unnecessary challenge to vote. I found myself wanting to vote for 3 posts — all with different focuses. The posts should have been subdivided into categories and voted on in that manner.
b) PollDaddy’s voting widget is too easily susceptible to illegitimate votes. By changing my browser’s user agent I just finished voting 24 times. Okay, just twice, but techies are abundant in this audience — expect ‘fraudulent’ votes.
On a good note, there were some decent suggestions in there. Interesting reads.
I think you pretty much got what you wanted. : )
“A sucker is born every minute” was by far the most clever and cunning post, the others were well done in academically bashing them, but based on humour, cleverness, creativity and possibly a little bit of truth…a sucker is born every minute is right on.
Ya, gotta say bit of a snore fest on the winners. Or maybe im just bitter because mine got no mention (link above). Didn’t exactly follow the rules, but what fun is that?
Guess I’m mostly bummed because now I’ll have to pay for web 2.0. Sorry kids looks like its going to be an imaginary Christmas this year.
“Look tommy got a new bike!” :: sits down and makes pedaling motion ::
In any case it was fun, hopefully this wont be the last contest here.
‘Sucker is Born Every Minute ‘ got my vote too though – to be honest – I didnt read through all the finalists posts either …..
MA, Why don’t you just ask people to come and shit on your head? I can understand criticism but this just plain wierd.
Since I did not enter, I was surprised to see my authentic TC rant included in the ‘just missed the cut off’ section (but it looks like it was buried there mind… especially considering it was published well BEFORE your little rant fest).
Some of the top 10 rants are pure feeble… with little disclaimers at the end saying ‘I didn’t really mean it’. wtf W…..s, tos..s, fuc.w.ts
And since I cannot game the system in my own favor…
I’m voting for : Delusions of skill and of grandeur
Clearly a kindred spirit.
wow!, that’s the first time I don’t see John Chow among the contestants. Come on, John!… How come you missed it, I guess you were dining out somewhere. Or was it bunch of other ‘Reviewme’ reviews?.
Oh, c’mon StartUpCrunch, as someone who started his/her (?) site displaying fake sponsorhip badges I really doubt you find kindred spirits here.
@Zooli
been to any good barbeque’s recently?
I always thought the “naked guy” from back in your http://www.tech...heir-amorality/ post should have got it. Too bad the video is down. I think TC should send him tickets as he was ahead of the curve.
Eric: The “naked guy” is Loren Feldman . He is occasionally funny.
“A Sucker is Born Every Minute..” gets my vote. I never would’ve thought of it that way. Micheal, you’re a brilliant PR specialist.
435 votes for the 9th entry down???
hmm…
Sucker gets it for me.
Where the heck was the “Arrington falls on hards times, resorts to link bait” post? Folk are losing their touch.
StaaaaartTupCrunch,
Why, are you hosting one? In Europe? Am I invited? Or is it at a virtual location?
Holy crap, “Sucker” has nearly 50% the votes!
Nice one sucker, good job getting the word out, lol.
TrashCrunch won the contest – just as I predicted
Gee, TechCrunch now has comment moderation? I’m getting tempted to trash it again
Been on vacation this week so missed the voting, but I should point out that my post “To All The TechCrunch Haters” which just missed the cut is not “too nice” at all. If all y’all had read a little closer, you might have caught the sarcasm. The site in question, KritX, which Arrington loved so much, is actually no longer in existence, and all that exists is an “Under Construction” page full of random ads for plastic surgery and ringtones. A lesson in this for you, Mike: sometimes sarcasm in writing is completely lost on those you might try to hurt with it.
Props to “Delusions of skill and of grandeur” — lots of programming history in that post.
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